(a sermon for 11th August, see Ephesians 4.25-5.2)
Today’s sermon is Be Kind. Be Kind. When you bump into someone later and they say What have you been up to today and you say ‘I went to church’ and they say ‘What was the preacher on about?’ and you say ‘the vicar said we should Be Kind.’ And then they say ‘That’s a bit lame’ and then you say ‘Well then it shouldn’t be difficult for you to practice it’.
I loved the Seaford Photographic Society display of a fortnight ago. I hoped you got to pop in and see it. There was an amazing photo of a wild bear eating a fish, and whilst I thought ‘that’s a great photo’ I also wondered ‘Who is watching the photographer’s back? Who is checking that there isn’t another hungry bear behind you! And I loved the close-up of a couple of mating dragonflies – amazing photo – a bit scary to see one the size of A3 paper.
I got asked to be the judge! That’s scary! So I went for a pic that evoked some old childhood memories of camping in the hills.
What impressed me about all the photos was how hard each one had had to work to get each photo. It didn’t look like it had come easily – they had to get the right kit, the right time of day, some artistic thought about composition, quite a lot of patience, and no small amount of luck to have it all come together.
So a sermon where the whole point is to: be kind. Its mostly easy right up to the point where it isn’t. Its going to take some practice.
Here’s a list of what St Paul would like you to put into practice – Speak truthfully. Do something useful. Be Kind, Be compassionate. Walk the way of love.
Here’s what you don’t want to be doing: Speaking lies, letting anger get the better of you, or for that matter bitterness, brawling, slander, malice.
You’re mostly of that generation where you were brought up proper and told to tell the truth from an early age. But we are also living in a time where image is more important than truth –
so the Army recently got in to trouble over hushing up some racism and bullying and they must have take the decision that it’s better to say it didn’t happen, it’s not that bad, sweep it under the carpet, nothing to see here, Than to say Yes its bad and this is what we’re doing about it.
And the dear CofE has not always got this right either.
So telling the truth is what God calls us to but that might be costly. Being Kind you see is not always cheap advice.
St Paul says Do something useful. This is always good advice. Do something useful. But perhaps we could put it on our to-do list for tomorrow. Maybe another time. Note that St Paul is keen that we do something useful so that we have something to share – Paul is thinking money, but we could broaden that to time and to cake, and to various rotas and ways in which we as a church serve and bless the community. Do something useful.
There’s no excuse for any of you to be indulging in Slander or in Brawling – but beware of Social Media and the ease with which sharing and liking something – on, say Facebook, can lead to some unnecessary nastiness. And don’t wade into arguments with fools, you wont win that Brawl, you will just get riled and say something, type something, regrettable.
So No Slander, No Brawling and then St Paul says Get rid of malice. This is even harder than getting rid of Bitterness.
Ok Bitterness – you’re going to need some help to recognise that this is what you’re carrying. Its not difficult, you say something and a brave friend says to you – My friend, you sound a little bitter!
And in that moment you will know the truth of it. You will flash back and say ‘Well it hurts, you don’t know the pain I carry’ and then you say ‘Well how about talking to someone about it, how about praying with someone’.
At some point or other you’re going to have to work out whether carrying that bitterness is helpful or not.
Anne Lamott said that not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and then waiting for the rat to die.
At some point, when you’re ready, you will need to address the issue of forgiveness.
But St Paul isn’t finished, he goes on to say Get rid of malice.
Getting rid of malice isn’t as easy as it sounds. Its not the same as getting rid of a broken pencil that sits on your table. I also don’t think it’s as easily cured by the difficult journey of forgiving someone.
Malice may not be so easily sorted out by the simple exercise of Being Kind and Doing something useful.
If we are to rid ourselves of bitterness and malice then we need to start by remembering who we are.
St Paul, ch5v1 reminds us that we are dearly loved children. Dearly loved children. Hold on to that.
So when St Paul says ‘Don’t let the sun go down while you are angry’ – this is great advice – particularly for anyone who is married, for anyone living in a family community of sorts. Its too easy to slam the door and then let the anger fester and then in the morning ‘Who will be the bigger man and say Sorry?
Who will be the first to repair the breach?’ This is a great way for bitterness to grow, and for malice to develop.
So good advice: Don’t let the sun go down on your anger. You can see that we’re still not that far away from ‘Be Kind’ but you can also see that its not as easy to apply as you might have thought. It will take some courage and humility, to choose to say Sorry before the damage is done.
But St Paul adds to this wisdom that the reason why you don’t want to let the sun go down on your anger is because you do not want to give the devil a foothold.
Now this is good news and its bad news. The good news is to note that all the devil gets here is a foothold. That means that you, we, need to remember who we belong to. You are dearly loved Children of God. Remember that.
Through the love of Jesus, the death of Jesus, the resurrection of Jesus and His love poured out into our hearts – through our baptism and our receiving of Jesus in prayer and hope – remember the baptism liturgy: ‘Christ claims you for His own, receive the sign of the cross’.
So here’s a moment where by faith we see that we are claimed for Christ, where the devil does not have even a foothold, because we belong to Christ – to all who received Him He gave the right to become children, children born of God.
You are dearly loved Children of God
So you and me – Christ has claimed for His own. And that means that the devil has no right, no place to be.
IF we were remotely Pentecostal, someone would at this point start shouting a hallelujah!
That’s the good news. Christ forgave you, Christ claimed you, Christ died for you, Christ’s love fills you.
Can I get another Hallelujah?!
But in the sin, in the bitterness and malice, we allow these spiritual maggots to breed under our skin, we give the devil a foothold.
And it’s hard when the itch is addictive.
It is oddly not that difficult to be free, but it is very difficult to want to be free.
So it might be that our first prayer to be praying – yes I’m afraid this sort of thing can only come out by prayer – is the prayer to want to be free.
Malice will not come out by you working hard at being Kind. You’re going to need to pray. And you might find it helpful to have someone pray over you and for you and with you.
I can tell you that this sermon is much easier to preach than it is to practice!
So much bitterness and malice passes under the disguise of Anger. And Anger is sometimes but not always an evil.
There was a retired Archdeacon, Mina Smallman, she said that she has forgiven the murderer of her two daughters. Gosh I think that’s quite something. She then went on to say But I have not forgiven those police who took photos and shared them with friends in a derogatory manner. She’s not forgiven those who took photos but she has forgiven the murderer. She went on to explain how she feels that the anger she’s still holding is helping her to drive up the standards in the Police so that we can have the Police we deserve.
I thought that was rather good. Her anger is helping to focus her energies on something useful, on speaking truth to power, on bringing about a better world.
But be careful because most anger doesn’t do that, it just eats away and be careful because it often does it under the cloak and pretence of Righteous Anger.
As you come to Communion to receive the body and blood of Christ, let these reminders of God’s love for you sink deep in, whisper a quiet Amen and a Thank you Jesus. Perhaps some of you will be ready to come up to the Holy Spirit Chapel and spend further in prayer, and as you return to your chair, ask God for help
If we are to Be Kind, if we are to walk the way of love, then remember that you are, we are Dearly Loved Children of God, that the Devil at best has merely a foothold – and that through God’s grace and the power of prayer even that can be driven out, and God’s love can be poured in, and we can be helped to live a life that is Kind, even Useful, and that walks in the way of love. Amen.
(Photo from a series of bible pictures someone gave me)